The Things That Keep You Stuck Were Once the Things That Helped You

We all get stuck.
Sometimes the way you get stuck is obvious. You stay too long in the wrong job, can’t break a habit, or avoid a decision you know you need to make. Other times, it’s more subtle: a constant sense of restlessness, a cycle of overthinking, a low hum of dissatisfaction you can’t quite name.

When you find yourself stuck, it’s tempting to blame external circumstances or yourself. You might say, “I’m just not disciplined enough,” or “If only I had more time, more clarity, more confidence.”

So let’s take a moment and challenge these assumptions: what if the real reason you’re stuck isn’t weakness or confusion?

What if you’re stuck because part of you is still holding on to something that used to be important?

Often, the habits, attitudes, beliefs, or relationships that keep you stuck were once adaptive:

• That perfectionism? It may have helped you gain approval or avoid mistakes in a high-pressure environment.
• That tendency to avoid conflict? It might have kept you safe in situations where speaking up wasn’t welcome.
• That belief that you must succeed alone? Maybe it grew out of times when you had no one else to rely on.

These strategies weren’t “bad.” In fact, they probably helped you survive, achieve, or find a sense of control. But just like outgrown clothes, what once fit beautifully can eventually start to constrict.

The hard part is that you often don’t see these internal patterns clearly. You just feel the friction. You sense the tension between who you’ve been and who you’re becoming.

This is where coaching makes a real difference.

With a coach, you can start to notice the silent assumptions guiding your choices. You can examine the beliefs you didn’t realize you were carrying. You can bring compassion to the parts of you that are still trying to protect you even if their methods are outdated.

Coaching creates a space where you’re not judged or pushed, but invited. Invited to:

• question gently,
• witness your inner world with curiosity,
• begin choosing not just from habit, but from awareness.

And change doesn’t have to be dramatic. Sometimes, the most meaningful shifts come from small moments: a new insight, a permission slip, a softened voice inside.

If you’re feeling stuck, ask yourself:
What might I be holding on to that once helped me, but now holds me back?

And if you’re ready to explore those patterns with someone who can walk beside you without judgment, agenda, or urgency, coaching might be the space you need to take that next step.

Because the goal isn’t to force change. It’s to grow into who you’re meant to be with clarity, self-trust, and grace.